There's always something nice about a familiar face, y'know?
I saw my oldest client again last week. He was not my very first client, but was definitely my second or third, and he has come back once every couple months ever since. Every time he’s in town, he makes a stop at my studio to spend 90 minutes edging up to the best orgasm he’s had since the last time he was there, and he is an absolute delight. Loyal, responsible, respectful to a fault, and always supportive. The only time he skipped out on seeing me when he was in town was when his mother passed away, and I think that’s pretty damn excusable…but he apologized just the same.
Anyway, it occurred to me this last time I saw him that I’ve gotten to know him a bit over time (as one does when one is open to conversation and such). He’s gotten progressively more comfortable making suggestions as to what he wants to try, and now is even enthusiastically supporting my new endeavors into femdom training, for which I am both touched and grateful. He’s as close as any of my clients would come to being called a friend.
Client-provider relationships-- it takes two
I frequently get compared to therapists, and in many ways, I suppose it’s not far off. People come to me for catharsis, sometimes, and hopefully they’re able to learn a bit about themselves, maybe even grow or experience some self-actualization. And I don’t know about you, but I’m a strong proponent of therapy, and as someone who has seen many a therapist over the years, I often get to a point where I feel friendly towards them. It’s always a little weird, because you know it can’t be the type of relationship where you go grab a drink, and you are paying for them to talk to you, after all, but I think it’s insulting to imply that they’re only listening because you’re paying them to. I think it can be their job and they can genuinely care about their clients at the same time. There just have to be professional boundaries, and that’s okay.
It works the same way with me, although the boundaries are drawn differently. But the more often I see someone, the better we get to know each other. I care about their experience with me, sure, but I care about them as people, too. And they become more and more comfortable in my company, which typically only ever improves their experience.
It comes down to trust, ultimately. I have to screen any new client, because I obviously can’t take their word for it that they’re a decent human and not a psycho with a record for assault. But once that’s settled, I don’t have to check and re-check every time– they’re established, and now I know them. The first time we have to take some “get to know you” time, but after that, we can skip that part, because I know what they like, and they’re relaxed enough to let me know if there’s something new they might want to try. If they were to make me uncomfortable, I wouldn’t see them again, of course, but that has yet to happen. Typically, we both get to know each other a bit better over time, and both get more comfortable as trust is cultivated. And that’s lovely.
And really, who doesn’t enjoy meeting with someone who is genuinely happy to see them?